THAT WAS THE BOX – August 2015 (Week Two) | TV Reviews
Hi Readers!
Many apologies, but there isn’t much from me this week. I am currently suffering from vertigo. A particularly nasty ailment which makes thinking, focusing and writing, all pretty difficult, and therefore makes concentrating on the TV even harder. So there are only a couple of reviews and hopefully normal service will be resumed next week.
‘THE GREAT BRITISH BAKE OFF‘ (BBC1 – BBC IPLAYER)
This week it was Biscuit Week and our eleven contestants had three challenges to sort the wheat from the chaff. The Signature Challenge was to make 24 identical Biscotti – you know those horrible things you always buy in Costa Coffee and immediately regret because they break your teeth. We certainly had some weird variations. Nurse Alvin used Jackfruit, a fruit I’ve never heard of which is popular in the Philippines. Apparently it tasted okay though. Everyone else chose to put dried fruit in their Biscotti, with young Flora showing off and doing a Wedding Biscotti (me neither) with fennel and sesame seeds. Unfortunately for Flora, she does nothing to play down her poshness, and us Brits are a funny lot and I fear this might go against her. We can cope with middle class. We can cope with posh people who are a bit stupid. What we can’t cope with are accomplished posh people (see Benedict Cumberbatch), so if I was Flora, I’d play it down a bit and maybe next week make a burger bap instead of an artisan loaf.
I’m not quite sure with Dorret if it’s just her expression, or if she truly is out of her depth, but with every challenge, she looks perplexed and as though she’s about to give up. Her Biscotti didn’t work, she won the technical challenge, but her show-stopper fell short, and somehow she scraped through. Not sure how.
The Technical Challenge was to make Arlettes, which to the uninitiated are basically squashed, thin, cinnamon whirls that are baked to be biscuits. Something happened to Marie’s oven (raises eyebrow) and they didn’t bake properly. She was last week’s Star Baker and yet this week everything went against her.
The Show-stopper Challenge was to make an edible box filled with biscuits. Alvin planned to make a casket filled with brandy snaps, which sounded delicious, but ended up going a little bit wrong and all he ended up with were a few brandy snaps. Macho man Paul decided to make a box filled with pink biccies, for his wife and Nadiya planned to make a Chinese dome thing using cayenne pepper and ginger. Bloody hell, it would have blown your head off. It Like Alvin’s, it went a bit wrong, not helped by Sue Perkins who broke the dome. Mary and Paul couldn’t send Nadiya home after that, it would be completely unfair.
My favourite box was probably Dorret’s box of frogs, which apparently tasted bland but looked cute. My least favourite was Ugne’s weird box with a fondant baby crawling up it. But according to Paul, the biscuits were lovely. Matt’s cute fire engine was great too and would be lovely for a child’s party.
Ian got Star Baker, largely for using rosemary in his Biscotti and a weird cylinder thing for his box, and Marie – star of show one, got sent home. Next week they tackle bread. Expect Sandy gurning at the camera while she kneads, Dorret appearing confused and lots of double entendres about buns from Mel and Sue.
‘VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS‘ (CHANNEL 4 – ALL4)
I follow VBP on Twitter and really enjoy reading their entries. Most of them are so accurate that I cringe when reading them. It’s so popular that it has now been given its own TV show, narrated by British institution Julie Walters and starring a number of celebs, such as James Corden, Steven Mangan, Nigel Havers and Ruth Jones expressed their worst nightmares when dealing with other people. Something us Brits aren’t very good at, in social situations. Some situations such as going to the doctor or complaining about things, aren’t a problem, personally. I do think we, as a nation, are getting better at complaining, and I think the awkwardness at the doctor’s is more a male thing than a female thing, as men don’t like talking about their problems.
One of the funniest anecdotes came from Vic Reeves, who recalled an hilarious prostate examination, and the time when he thought the man behind him on the train was farting and he was instead, randomly, peeling a boiled egg.
I think the programme would be enhanced by more foreigners, instead of American Rich Hall and Irish Aisling Bea, expression their bewilderment at our behaviour. Let’s face it, our awkwardness and weirdness seems normal to us, it would be funnier to hear from those who find us bizarre and it might make us realise how stupid we can be.